Sunday, September 20, 2009

God's Remarkable Timing


My trip south was a timely one as my brother, William Edward (Bill) Wilson reposed in the Lord on Tuesday, on the afternoon that I arrived to be with my mother for a few days. It was rather amazing that I was there with her, a surprising thing.

On my visit to see my Mother we had spent the morning and afternoon driving all over the surrounding community visiting old and favorite spots. Mind you, that is two generations of favorite spots. We stopped in the afternoon a little after 4:00 at the cemetery to visit my father's grave.

It seemed strange and disorienting, as we tried to find the right row, for there was a canopy over the area about where my father's headstone should be. Then I thought maybe I had the wrong row, but I was in the right location. My mother's burial plot is next to my father's headstone and the canopy was at the grave plot next to that.

During the time that we were out of the car, my sister-in-law called and left a message on the phone notifying us of Bill 's passing. I had left the phone in the car and so didn't get it right away.

It was just so strange and lovely. Seemingly a message of Bill's passing into God's hands; A very gentle and sweet honoring of Bill, who was a very unique, loving and remarkable person.
May his memory be eternal!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Struggle


This has been a period of struggle for me. My Mother who was living with us, fell and needed a lot of pretty intense nursing. She now is in a nursing home in our home town several hours from us. It is a beautiful place, a Christian nursing home and the people there reflect Christ. They are caring and very sweet, as is the community that is there.

There are still details that need to be taken care of and I plan to drive down there again this next week to see if they can be accomplished. There is also a certain worry about her though I know she is living where and how she wants to. It seemed to me that it was like I was taking her to college, in a way yes...though she is more helpless as she is almost blind and very hard of hearing, so worries about how she is able to get along. Something I need to shed as I know God is watching over her and that there are people there to help her.

This morning's reading of the Matin's Gospel speaks to that. It is one of my favorite readings and one that Mother and I discussed before she went off on this adventure.


John 10:9-16 (Matins Gospel)
9
I am the door. If anyone enters by Me, he will be saved, and will go in and out and find pasture.
10
The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.
11
I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd gives His life for the sheep.
12
But a hireling, he who is not the shepherd, one who does not own the sheep, sees the wolf coming and leaves the sheep and flees; and the wolf catches the sheep and scatters them.
13
The hireling flees because he is a hireling and does not care about the sheep.
14
I am the good shepherd; and I know My sheep, and am known by My own.
15
As the Father knows Me, even so I know the Father; and I lay down My life for the sheep.
16
And other sheep I have which are not of this fold; them also I must bring, and they will hear My voice; and there will be one flock and one shepherd.


In many ways I see myself (and my own ablility to help myself )as the 'hireling'. I am totally at the mercy of those that want to chase me away from the flock and my center which is Christ.

Here I am set to watch over myself and keep myself on the right road, in a happy space and at peace. Not so easy when one becomes shaken and troubled.

Jesus is the Shepherd, thank God! I just need to say 'Uncle' and let Him be the Shepherd.